Setting Intentions for 2025
Welcome to 2025, new year, new intentions!
For many, New Year’s resolutions are tradition. I, however, believe more about the letting go of unhealthy things, resetting of intentions, and re-envisioning of desires and accomplishments in the new year. For some, that may seem redundant, but I don't think so.
Resolution has this sense of firm resolve, that may be too lofty to achieve. It may seem almost futile once we get into a few weeks and discipline wanes, so we give up. Bear with me, as these are my thoughts and obviously just my perspectives on what re-setting means in my work.
My work is with clients in difficult relationships, where one person may exhibit narcissistic or borderline personality traits, and another exhibits codependent traits. Resetting an intention means “I don't want this relationship anymore. I need to work on myself to either navigate the relationship in a healthy manner or to get out of the relationship and be healthy.” Maybe we're not seeking authenticity because we are trapped in fear.
I also work with clients struggling with religious abuse, spiritual abuse, or “church hurt” trying to live up to impossible expectations. Maybe a person is married to a partner in ministry leadership that is more bondage, oppression, and duty than a true marriage. Maybe a person comes from an upbringing of strict religious background to the point where there is now bitterness or floundering.
Resetting an intention may be revisiting beliefs in God or spirituality. This could be less focus on rules or dogma of a church, a synagogue, a temple, or a specific religion, and more focus on self and what a relationship to God could be or how one’s inner spirit self could have peace.
It is not as much a resolution, or resolving, which is more about a thought or an attitude to do something, as much as it is a reconfiguring and reevaluating, which are actionable steps. Resetting may require such questions as “Who am I?”, “What do I believe?”, “How do I want to effect change?”, “What do I want?” “What am I willing to let go of?”
Whether a work environment, a family member (an aging parent, or an adult child), an intimate partner relationship, or being part of a group or a religious association, one needs to ask what is dissatisfying and how can life be improved.
The reality is we cannot necessarily change our environment, and we cannot change our partners or our work relationships, but we can change ourselves. The challenge now is to evaluate our self-esteem, our ability to say “no”, our boundaries, our vulnerabilities, how we are motivated, and how we prioritize and use our time. Let go of unhealthy patterns and relationships, re-set your vision, and find your voice. Be who you want to be, while surrounding yourself with those who can help you achieve these things.
