Adult Third Culture Kids (TCK)
Effects on Adult Third Culture Kids (TCK)
What is a Third Culture Kid? Someone who is born in one country but spends most of their formative years, growing up or moving constantly, in another country or countries. This could be due to parents’ jobs being in the military, or diplomats, or with an oil company, or teaching in an international institution, or in some ministry role (i.e. missionary). My parents were the latter. I am a TCK.
I was born in the U.S. but at the young age of 6 months, my parents, sister and I sailed by ship to Indonesia where I spent the next 17 years! We had furloughs (home-leave) every fifth year. I was in the U.S. only when I was 4 years old, in 4th grade and in 9th grade. That was it! America was just a country we visited for part of a year; it was not home.
I attended an international high school in Jakarta, Indonesia for most of high school. I was at home there. Indonesia was my home, my culture, it was what I knew.
For reasons never known, my parents left Indonesia the middle of my senior year of high school (!?!), and I had to complete the final semester of senior year of high school in “smalltown”, USA (Oklahoma) with people I did not know and in a culture I had not lived. Talk about a fish out of water! I looked like the average American kid, but I did not feel like I belonged. This is how a TCK feels.
Adult Third Culture Kids (TCKs) often have unique experiences and face distinct challenges due to their upbringing in one or in multiple cultures. Here are some effects commonly observed in adult TCKs:
Cultural Adaptability: TCKs often develop strong adaptability skills, being able to navigate different cultures with ease. They tend to be open-minded and flexible when encountering new environments, people, races, ethnicities.
Identity Formation: TCKs frequently struggle with questions of identity and belonging. Having grown up in multiple cultures, they may find it challenging to define where they belong or to identify with a single nationality or culture. “Where are you from?” is one of the most difficult questions for a TCK. Most of us are global nomads, or citizens of the world, or “from” wherever our childhood was formed.
Language Proficiency: Exposure to multiple languages during childhood often leads to multilingual proficiency in adult TCKs. We either speak multiple languages, or we have an ease and affinity for recognizing accents, or identifying where people are from very easily. We have “an ear” for different cultures. This linguistic ability can be a significant asset in both personal and professional contexts.
Global Perspective: TCKs tend to have a broader worldview, often possessing a deeper understanding and compassion of global issues and cultural differences. This global perspective can be advantageous in multicultural environments. When it comes to international events, TCKs tend not to “buy into” local news, but are more prone to challenge and question status quo, fact checking with their own non-American news sources that may have a more accurate pulse on a situation.
Relationship Building: TCKs may find it easier to establish connections with people from diverse backgrounds and harder to establish connections with people from their nation of citizenship, given their experience of forming relationships across cultures. Maintaining long-term relationships can be challenging to a TCK due to frequent relocations and friends coming and going throughout their lives. This lends toward resilience, self-confidence, and independence but also contributes to possible aloofness in trust or making strong friendships.
Career Choices: TCKs often pursue careers that involve international travel or cultural exchange. Their cross-cultural skills and global perspective make them well-suited for roles in diplomacy, international business, or humanitarian work. If a TCK is working in the United States, he/she may be involved in a multi-culturally focused service industry because they are comfortable and feel more at home. Otherwise, you will find that a TCK has an adventurous spirit and travels often.
Emotional Resilience: Constantly adapting to new environments and saying goodbye to friends can foster emotional resilience in TCKs. They learn to cope with, and actually may be more comfortable with, change and uncertainty more effectively than their monocultural counterparts.
Sense of Rootlessness: Despite their adaptability, some TCKs may struggle with a sense of rootlessness or feeling disconnected from any one place or culture. This can lead to feelings of loneliness or a longing for a place to call home. The saying, “Home is where your heart is” rings most true for a TCK because it is hard to feel rooted in one place after having grown up moving often, or now living in a culture different from where they grew up.
Cultural “Chameleoning”: TCKs may engage in cultural “chameleoning”, where they unconsciously adapt their behavior, speech, or mannerisms to fit in with different cultural contexts. While this skill is advantageous, it can also result in a loss of authentic self-expression at times. Due to this adaptability; however, most TCKs do well socially; whether being an introvert or an extrovert, they have learned to play the part of the culture in which they live (or have lived).
Identity Integration: As they mature, some TCKs embark on a journey of identity integration, embracing their multicultural background and finding a sense of belonging in their unique identity as global citizens.
These effects can vary greatly among TCKs depending on factors such as the number of cultures experienced, the length of time in each culture, and personal temperament. These common themes may provide insight into the complex experiences of adult TCKs.
If you are a TCK and struggle to adapt, or think you are alone in your “feelings of being an outsider”, contact me. Just click on the “Contact” form on this website.
